I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize