My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
