Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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