im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
