He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I want to fling myself into the sun
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
