someone threw a dead crab at me
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize