how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
