Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
