I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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