It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
