worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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