I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
