Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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