Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
