I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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