hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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