she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed