Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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