I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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