This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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