Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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