I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
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I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
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I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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