wrigley field is MILF paradise
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Boobs are out for the taking
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
