You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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