I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
