i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
