Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Randomize
