the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize