You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
True strength comes from lack of pants
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
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