So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
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It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
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Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.