Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
