It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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