his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize