Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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