bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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