pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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