Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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