you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
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