I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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