did you get engaged???
i just had sex bonerless
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
