i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
it was like eating out sand paper
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
