i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
