Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
