i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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