just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
