Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
