hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
