Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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