CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
My vagina is very pro this idea
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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