I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
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