can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
