Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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