so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
